Living Water

When God created the Earth, it was full of still water; It was full of chaos and the unknown. However, when God separated the dry land from the still waters on the third day, He enabled the power of water to take hold.

Water can become a gas, liquid or solid. It has the ability to carve through the most solid rock and land formation. It has the power to overcome that which man has built. It destroyed the Earth in the flood and it continues to destroy cities on Earth through flooding today. However, water is so much more than that!

The human body is made up of around 70% water in total. The brain, that which we hold so dear, and kidneys are around 80-85% water. Even our teeth are made of around 8-10% water. Our muscles, skin, and liver are 70-75% and our lungs and hearts are around 75-80% water. Moreover, our blood is 50% water. If this is the case, then water is of the utmost importance in our lives (the reason we can't go three day's without water or we die).

More than water being important in our world as a system of cleaning, destruction, transformation, and that which enables us to live, water is what God is recognized by - He is the Living Water! John 7: 38 tells us that He is living water. To have water in us as a way to survive is one thing, but to have living water in us is completely different. Living water running through us means that we will never thirst (spiritually), and that our ENTIRE body is devoted to the will of God, not our own. We are made almost entirely of water, and, because of that, the living water would encompass our being and we truly would be the body of Christ.

Never Forgotten

We Are Never Forgotten

 6 Are not five sparrows sold for two farthings, and not one of them is forgotten before God? 7 But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered . Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows. (Luke 12: 6-7)

In a world where we don't care about others, in a world where nothing matters but yourself, it is easy to feel forgotten. It's also easy to feel like everyone is staring at you. It can feel that nothing is ever good enough in this world; however, you are worth much more than you think you are and you are not forgotten before God.

In relation to God, God will not forget you, ever. It is only how He remembers you that matters for God knows how many hairs are on all of our heads, not just those who believe in Him. Thus, God will either remember you forever as a follower of Christ or a person who does not believe.

Further, it is important that those who believe not get a swelled head because, while we are God's chosen people, believing doesn't mean that we are better than anyone else. We still sin, we still have impure thoughts! All this means is that, because we know that it is a sin, we are actually worse off. Those who do not know about God cannot be condemned for living as the world lives; however, they do no know about God because believer are not witnessing. We should not hold ourselves on such a high pedestal as to think that we are better than anyone else, if anything we should know that we are worse. Still, we are never forgotten! We sinners are never forgotten! To live in a world where being looked over or scrutinized comes all to often, know that God will not forsake you, He will keep you, and never forget you no matter what you do.

When One Door Shuts...

When he opens a door, no one can close it. And when he closes it, no one can open it. 8 I know your deeds. See, I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut. I know that you have little strength, yet you have kept my word and have not denied my name. - (Revelation 3: 7-8)

 Everyone who asks will receive. The one who searches will find, and for the one who knocks, the door will be opened. - (Matthew 7:8)

“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” - Alexander Graham Bell

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When we trust God, He will always set before you opportunities. Some opportunities we will pass by in fear, others we will take and become the happiest we have ever been. God, however, also sets before us choices. Sometime the open door is a test. Sometimes the open door is a chance to go back to the old and familiar, to be with that one person again, or to go back to an old job you left awhile back. The choice we make is our opportunity. If we pass by the old to progress to the new, if we stay out of comfort, then we could gain new knowledge and possibly change lives. If we pass by the old, we could also never discuss with that person their beliefs and show them to Christ. What then do we do when an opportunity/ choice presents itself? I think I have a check list:

1. Go to God First - when you run to God, when you seek first the kingdom of heaven, life will present itself to you. God knows your past, present, and future deeds. He would not put a door in front of you that, with His help, you could not get back on the straight and narrow path. When He puts that opportunity in front of you, no one can close it but Him! God knows we cannot do it without Him as we have little strength. Yet, as long as we live for Him, He will keep us safe.
2. Ask For The Right Answer - God tells us that He wants us to go to Him. He wants us to ask Him what to do when we are stuck. He also, however, wants us to know what to do in the first place. Nevertheless, He will not strike you down dead if you ask for His help. In fact, He welcomes it. If you really want to know the right answer, it will present itself to you. If you really want a situation to happen to glorify God, and you ask and "knock on the door" it will be opened and it will happen. If you want to plant a church, but are stuck in what the first step is, ask God! If you want to go on a missions trip or help a next door neighbor, ask God! He will provide what you need to make it happen to glorify Him. If you want it only to glorify yourself, He may give it to you, just not in your time. (Have you ever noticed that when you feel you really need to find something and you search for it you never find it. It is only when you stop looking that you receive it. This is the same thought process.)
3. Stop Wishing -  When a door that we have either chosen to pass through or pass by closes, we should not regret that decision. We have learned something from that opportunity or choice that we needed to learn in order to continue forward in life. When we look on that past opportunity, that past choice that we wish we could change, and that is all we do, what do we really have in life? Our life then becomes a waste as all we do is sit around wishing that this or that could have happened instead. This is not trusting in God, it is a distrust in Him. I said in my past blog that I have had regret in life and that I wouldn't want to change them because they made me who I am. I will say that if all I did was sit and wish for this and that to have happened, I would not have started the previous blog that brought me closer to God. I would not have spoken to the person that showed me where my fault was. I would not have been kind or considerate to the people that most people think are weird and awkward. Those people have helped me more than "normal" people ever could. 
4. Stop Being Normal - Matthew 7: 13-14 tells us that wide is the path that many will go through. It tells us that it will lead to destruction. This wide path is normalcy. Normalcy is being broke, divorced, drunken, sad, depressed, regretful, helpless, gossipers, narcissistic, and just plan being broken. It also tells us, however, that few will go through the straight and narrow gate that leads to life. Be weird!!! When family is strong, peer-pressure is low; when family is weak, peer-pressure is strong. A family that decides that a family dinner is more important than eating in front of the t.v., a family who decides that a game night is more important than spending money on a four-person family movie night, a family who decides that cooking at home is the best way to save and to become closer will have stronger values. When a college student doesn't do the "normal" thing of partying and drinking every night, when a person would rather read the Bible than watch porno, when a person becomes weird in a God sort of way, weird become better. It is being holy as "holy" means set apart, being different. Be holy as God is holy and be different. Yes you will be criticized. Yes, you will be the butt of all jokes. Yes, you will be persecuted. Yes, you will feel like crap many times. But, work through it as God said that the world will only hate us if we are not of the world. Stop being normal and be weird!!!!

When these four things are accomplished, I have no doubt that you will know the right action to take and that you will take it. To go to God first and ask for the right answer to present itself in His time, to stop wishing for the what if's and could have been's and look at the situation that is occurring now, and to be weird will tell you the best course of action to take. No matter how much they tease you or hurt you, do what you know is right! Stop trying to please everyone as you cannot please everyone, but  you can please God.

Love is Not in the Eye of the Beholder

If any one says, "I love God," and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen. (1 John 4:20)

The last post of my previous blog was "Known by it's Fruits." In this I spoke many words of Soren Kierkegaard. In this post, I will like wise quotes him often. In a compilation of Kierkegaard's works, Works of Love, I found many ideas that are worth sharing and living as they follow that of God's word. In the chapter entited "Our Duty to Love Those We See," I found this thought and metaphor to be extremely helpful in relation to love and loving others. 

Or, suppose there were two artists, and the one said, "I have traveled much and seen much in the world, but I have sought in vain to find a man worth painting. I have found no face with such perfection of beauty that I could make up my mind to paint it. In every face I have seen one or another little fault. Therefore I seek in vain." Would this indicate that this artist was a great artist? On the other hand, the second one said, "Well, I do not pretend to be a real artist; neither have I traveled in foreign lands, but remaining in the little circle of men who are closest to me, I have not found a face so insignificant or so full of faults that I still could not discern in it a more beautiful side and discover something glorious. Therefore I am happy in the art I practice. It satisfies me without my making any claim to being an artist." would this not indicate that precisely this one was the artist, one who by bringing a certain something with him found then and there what the much-traveled artist did not find anywhere in the world, perhaps because he did not bring a certain something with him! Consequently the second of the two was the artist. Would it not be sad, too, if what is intended to beautify life could only be a curse upon it, so that art, instead of making life beautiful for us, only fastidiously discovers that not one of us is beautiful. Would it not be sadder still, and still more confusing, if love also should be only a curse because its demand could only make it evident that none of us is worth loving, instead of love's being recognized precisely by its loving enough to be able to find some lovableness in all of us, consequently loving enough to be able to love all of us. - Soren Kierkegaard (p. 156-7)

 This is an amazing depiction, in my opinion, of how love isn't about just finding someone that we love their imperfections, but also to love everyone despite their imperfects and faults. We all have faults; thus, we should all love each other based on the fact that we all want and desire love and if we should be loved we should first love others.

"When this is the duty [loving your neighbor], the task is not: to find -- the lovable object; but the task is: to find the object already given or chosen -- lovable, and to be able to continue finding him lovable, no matter how he becomes changed." - Soren Kierkegaard (p. 158)

If for one minute you say that you do not love those who know you, if you say that you do not love your neighbor but rather hate him, you cannot love God according to 1 John.

"The Altar and the Door" and Somewhere in Between

Many times in the previous blog, I have posted lyrics by Casting Crowns. Their music and lyrics speak to me and they really touch my spirit. The song "The Altar and the Door" really touches me as it really hits the nail on the head - how can I be sure that I won't mess up between the praise I give at church and when I leave the church to live a daily life. In many ways, this song portrays many individuals lives. Here is a look at the lyrics:

 "The Altar And The Door"

Careless, I am reckless
I'm a wrong way traveling, slowly unraveling shell of a man
Burnt out, I'm so numb now
That the fire's just an ember way down in the corner of my cold, cold heart

Lord, this time I'll make it right
Here at the altar I lay my life
Your kingdom come but my will was done
My heart is broken

As I cry
Like so many times before
But my eyes
Are dry before I leave the floor
Oh Lord, I try
But this time, Jesus, how can I be sure
I will not lose my follow-through
Between the altar and the door?

Here at the altar
Oh my world so black and white
How could I ever falter
What You've shown me to be right

Lord, this time I'll make it right
Here at the altar I lay my life
Your kingdom come but my will was done
My heart is broken

As I cry
Like so many times before
But my eyes
Are dry before I leave the floor
Oh Lord, I try
But this time, Jesus, how can I be sure
I will not lose my follow-through
Between the altar and the door?

I'm trying so hard
To stop trying so hard
Just let You be who You are
Lord, who You are in me

Jesus
I'm trying so hard
To stop trying so hard
Just let You be who You are
Lord, who You are in me

Oh Lord, I cry
Like so many times before
But my eyes
Are dry before I leave the floor
Oh Lord, I try
But this time, Jesus, how can I be sure
I will not lose my follow-through
Between the altar and the door?

When I'm at church learning more of what I don't understand, I know that I'm getting closer to God; however, when I leave, I don't want to let Him down. I want to make sure that I carry through on my words. I want to make sure that I am on the right side, always making the best decisions. I don't want to be stuck in the middle, in the gray area of life, where I would trade a single dream for His. I don't want to feel like my to-do list for my life is better than His. He leads my life, not me. I may think that I want to be an accountant and I want to get my MBA and CPA. I may think that I need to have a great job that provides a lot of money so that I can be secure. I may think that life revolves around my schooling and my career, but it doesn't! Life revolves around the One True God!!!

I don't want to be luke-warm in my faith, I want to be burning with it. I want to abandon to Him, I want nothing more than to live for Him and the path that He wants my life to go. He will introduce me to people who are meant to test me, hinder me, help me, and people that I am to help. I pray that He gives me the ability to know the difference between these individuals. To know who to run from and who to I should stick around to help. Who can tell me who these people are except God, no one. I ask for God to open my eyes, I ask for Him to show me what I am supposed to do with my life and what I can do to serve Him. Let His will be done in my life for the war that is within me is strong and I cannot deny temptation without Him.

A New Start

For the past year, I have been posting updates on my blog called "The Hardest Victory is Over Self." A link to said blog is provided on the side bar. Within the past blog I transformed from a 20 year old girl who thought she had faith ever strong into a girl who finally gave up control to God. I posted for 53 days about lessons that I learned about myself, life, and faith. Finally, I gave up the control over my life that I never actually had; God had control the entire time, I just would not let my illusion of control go. Nevertheless, God helped me find my way to Him. Within the past blog, I laid out a lot about myself and who I was, what my mind thought like. Although I am changed, I am still human. The thoughts that I once conquered, when I am left alone to think, still creep into my mind. Because of this, I have made the title of this blog a title from my last blog; "Sent, Defined and Humbled."

Within the post "Day 18- Sent, Defined, and Humbled," I stated, in a nutshell, this:

In John 1: 6-10, John the Baptist shows why we are on this Earth. We are sent, defined and humbled. We were sent by God to this Earth. We were defined as witnesses. We were defined as witnesses of the verses and the good news to others. Finally, we were humbled in that John the Baptist realized that he was not the one that deserved the glory, God did. God is the light, we are not.

After the rest of the time that I spent on that blog, I realized that I always understood the first two elements of this teaching; however, I didn't always live the humbled life. I made life about me; I forced others to make their lives about me. After the 53 days, I have a new perspective - I deserve nothing in this life except death; however, God's unfailing grace set me free.  I will never measure up to Jesus, I will never measure up to perfect; yet, I know that my sins are forgiven. I am humbled before God in that I know that I am nothing unless He wants me to be. I have nothing unless He wants me to have it. I gain and lose nothing unless He makes it so. All I have is God's, not mine. I shall not make the possessions in this life so important that I would not lay them down to follow God. 

Also, during the past blog, I moved to a new state, Tennessee. New people, new atmosphere, new church, new school, new life, new start. I gave up the comfort of Ohio, the place I've always known, to move to a new place and get out of the land of the ordinary. I am able to be the real me, I am able to show others the me that I've hidden for so long. 

As I said before, I let go and actually changed the path on which my life was heading. I do not have fear for what I will or won't have, I do not worry about my life as I did before. I will trust God always. I know that the path that He has for my life (Jeremiah 29:11) is something that I will trust. There is one area in my life, however, that I find that I continue to fail. I recognize my failure as it occurs. I only stop it after the damage is done in my mind. My past does not define me unless I let it. My past in not my future unless I let it become so. I trust God, I trust He will provide and care for me in every way. If I trust as I say I do, I can not have a "but," "however," or "except;" yet I know that I'm having an issue in an area. I know that I cannot fix it on my own. I know that God will continue to test me in said area, the question is, will I pass the test?  

In light of my change, I have changed my blog. While the past is there never to forget in the old blog so that I can remember what I was, the new will define who I am, not who I was. 

Moreover, because of the new blog, I feel like I should have a new layout/ floor plan in you will of my blog. This change is that, while my last blog was more about the habit of spending time with God, this will not be a habit. This will be a place of praise, thanks, hope, and love. I will focus a lot on love as it is something that I will struggle with as I shall love my neighbor as myself; yet, I don't love myself in the right way to love another in that way. I still have plenty to work on in life, God will help me through it.