"I" - Wanting Something More

"I am not what I ought to be. I am not what I want to be. I am not what I hope to be. But still, I am not what I used to be. And by the grace of God, I am what I am." - John Newton

 "I" is a term we, the general population, use heavily. Looking back on papers that I have written for high school and college, I have found that writing without the word "I" sounds lifeless and academic (not a bad thing in those settings of course). However, I also found that, as I looked at previous blog posts and I thought about my daily interaction with people, that "I" is the most common word that I say. This would make since as I know the more about myself and my experiences than anyone else and I know what I have lived through and, thus, can share it. It would also make since because everyone likes to talk about themselves at some level. However, many people wants to hear only about themselves. If this is the way I come across to the general public, if I talk only about myself, how is the general public hearing about God from me? They aren't.

After realizing that "I" is a very large commonly used, one-letter-word in my vocabulary, I wondered what it would be like to cut out the word "I" for a day. Instead, if every time I wanted to talk about myself, I talked about God what would happen? God would work wonders through me and shine His light through me.


I will try this tomorrow, 12/19/2011; I will not talk about me... I hope this works....



"I" Papers
Okie-Booklady Blog

I said, "God, I hurt."
And God said, I know."

I said, "God, I cry a lot."
And God said, "That is why I gave you tears."

I said, "God, I am so depressed."
And God said, "That is why I gave you Sunshine."

I said, "God, life is so hard."
And God said, "That is why I gave you loved ones."

I said, "God, my loved one died."
And God said, "So did mine."

I said, "God, it is such a loss."
And God said, I saw mine nailed to a cross."

I said, "God, but your loved one lives."
And God said, "So does yours."

I said, "God, where are they now?"
And God said, "Mine is on My right and yours is in the Light."

I said, "God, it hurts."
And God said, I know."

Posted on the wall at the
Oklahoma City bombing site
by K. C. and Myke Kuzmic
Stockton, CA

Zoe Life

"Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life." - Steve Jobs

Death is guaranteed in life. But which form of life do I refer to? Death is guaranteed in, to use the Greek words, bios and suki. Bios is the life that is measurable. For instance, possessions are a reflection of a measurable thing. Suki is the life of our goals and values. Theses to will pass with our earthly death. However, there is another type of life in Greek: Zoe. Zoe is everlasting and eternal (αιώνιον) life like that in John 6:47. 

I can guarantee this truth: Every believer has eternal life. - John 6:47

Without God, everlasting life would not exist. Still, we, as humans, cannot wrap our minds around that which is infinite and everlasting. We cannot wrap our minds around the infinite gift of eternal life that God gave us when Jesus died on the cross for our sins.

This past Sunday, OneLife Church started a series called "unwrapped." It spoke about the heart of Christ and that He had and has a giving heart. I realized that even though I do not understand the eternal gift that God has given me, I should have a giving heart like Christ. I also realized that I do not.

My mother is an individual who would give the shirt off her back to help those in need. She expects nothing in return, not even love. I may criticize her on her relationship or walk with Christ, but she reflect the heart of God more than I do. I do not have a heart that judges in a gracious and giving light, only one that thinks "where did they get the sharpy and cardboard to make that sign" as I pass beggars on the street. This doesn't reflect the heart of the One that I serve or the Lord that I believe in.

The Lord has changed much about me in the past year; still, I must change further. I need to turn away from my cold heart and judgement and reflect the Lord in which I serve. I must completely destroy myself and let Him rebuild me from the inside out. The thing I wish to remain is why work-ethic, but if the Lord sees fit that that must change, He is in control of my life and He will make the change occur within me.

The gift that keeps on giving is one in which I do not understand: Eternal Life.